No where but still in college

Its long time, I post my last article. Due to the end semester exam, I couldn't update my writing. I will be back after a month.

Responsibility coming on the way

Being an elder brother from family is something to shoulder that younger’s brother and sister cannot do. The duty and feeling of eldest brother is good if I can serve my family. The burden of being elder brother, when I think of serving my family at this juncture when it’s impossible for me, is really a disheartening and feeling sad. The incapability of serving family at this juncture when it’s time to serve made me to think a lot. Sometime the unending thoughts especially at night, when I go to bed disturb my mind mentally and let my sleep go somewhere. I don’t know how my brother and sister have thoughts on serving of family. For me it’s something a tension when think of serving needy family at this point. I control my mind, not to think about it because thinking just adds tension in my mind. If the thinking of serving family is the solution in reality, the countless thoughts of mine in serving would have done, what I am supposed to do. So, thinking gives me a problem and I try to do away. I am eager to serve my family as fast as I can.

The gratitude for parent in bringing in this wonderful world and given every possible thing to me is always within me and now it’s my turn and times to repay my parents. Father and mother, for me, is everything. I have nothing to compare them in this world in terms of great. In fact they are greatest in this world. I am sad to know that I can’t repay them even in my next life. So I wish I am child of them till the mother earth exits. Seeing what I wish is impossible, remind me of only solution in repaying parents by having entered as a monk with pure mind. The hardships they have taken in bringing the sibling to condition that society believe is really a difficult task. Thinking the difficulties they have undergone, I have nothing to repay at this point of time when I am also in needy condition but I only I could do is to pray to kenchosum and Tsa-Wa-Lam to let my father and mother be the happiest man and woman on the earth. I wish always that my father and mother is in good condition. I love my dad and mum. And I love my sister Yedam Dema who always with my father and mother. On top of thanking father and mother for caring me, I have again somebody to thanks them. They are none other than my responsible sibling who always helps in serving our dad and mum. All my brother and sisters have soft mind and have mind to look after dad and mum and among us. I love my brother and sisters. I am sure that I could give my sister Yedam a good time when I am serving family after few years.
 I love dad,
 I love mum,
I love elder sister Lhamo,
 I love brother Dorji,
 I love sister Yedam and Salung, And finally my love to Sonam lhaden and kenchosum and Tsa-Wa-Lam.

Tsa-Wa-Lam

My success is solely depending on what my Tsa-Wa-Lam has blessed me. I believe on my Tsa-Wa-Lam. Whatever I do for the day, I start with praying to my Tsa-Wa-Lam as soon as I get up. Before I go to bed at night I again pray to my Tsa-Wa-Lam. Infact Tsa-Wa-Lam is always with me. Wherever I go or wherever I stay, I assumed my Tsa-Wa-Lam is along with me, on forehead during day time and in the heart of me during night time. I should have discipline in doing whatever I do knowing that Tsa-Wa-Lam is always with me. To let my events to be successful I have to have faith on Tsa-Wa-Lam. Without good faith I can’t have the successful event. My Tsa-Wa-Lam is enlighten and I believe if I pray and have good faith on my Tsa-Wa-Lam , there is no worry that my event will unsuccessful.

Hope of success go along with kenchosum.

Hoping a success and sweating is not the solution for me. As I believe in what we called the previous karma. If we have a connection in previous life that what we are doing this life, then thing will be much organize one. Praying to Tsa- Wa- lam and kenchoksum along with hardship is what I believe to have a success. To proceed my duty, I first pray to kenchosum. To let my proceed task shouldn’t be struck on the way. I regret for wasting my life doing meaningless task. I will bring my mind home and at least train my mind to be stable. Just by praying to kenchosum is not a solution for way to success. It’s only the way that’s your plan have no struck on the way of pursuing what you are pursuing

Who is Next now?

The blooming of flowers in most trees is yet started and the chirping of birds for the first time for that year (2004) has yet another marking of season. It’s exactly the time for school going children has come. Gom Dorji, a straight forward boy was in six. Gom was talented boy in every field be it games , studies and all round and of course bet naughty too. As he returns home from school at late night, he meets Namgay, a talkative, thin tall and charming lady. He gives his first sight to her at that time. Gaining of once heart was difficult in some cases. However due to previous karmic connection between them, as he requested to her as true lover, she accepted. The day of happiness for him began and ultimately for her. As time pass by, they went to date in weekends and share feelings and even kept so many promises for the future. They even spent night together.

As great Tibetan yogi Milarepa said “meeting in separation”, the time has come for them to depart. They are now in different valley as he has to study in Minjiwonng which is one day walk from village and she is still in village. He has the faith on her as he love her but he never know how she was tricky. As he was out of her sight, she started making new relation. However, when he comes for holiday she gives him a sign of love. Their relation last till the girl was pregnant of other boy. In between the girl was pregnant; he heard many things which usually were bad news. However he never believes what middle person says until and unless he sees with his eyes. I personally felt sympathy on the way he love and have great appreciation on his unwavering love. What you would do if your trusted girl done same as in the story?

 The days of together with Namgay was memorable and ultimately his unforgettable memories in his life. As she was now in that condition, circumstances force him to think a lot. Should I be her boy still? What his other boy would do on me, if I still be her boy? What other would think when I go in between then? Those thought all together asked him to forget her but she is still in his mind as she was his first love.

After a year pass by as he was now in Nganglam School, he love one girl. He controls his mind not to love her. When he thinks of what Namgay did, he decided to love to fade away his unforgettable hurt that was in his bottom of heart. After repeated request and waiting almost for a year Pema accept him. Days were short as days of winter when he has a time to stay with her even thought it was days of summer which is longer than other seasons. With full of hope and trust on pema, he decide that she to be his life partner. But the decision of Gom get alter when her previous boy meet with her in Nangkor school. Don’t even trust friends when we can’t trust ourselves. He was astonished to hear someone going negotiate between pema and his boy. He knows life is meaningless until and unless we make it meaningful. So, he understands the cruel mind of friends and takes it as a phenomenon of the life.