You made sense but in the wrong sense. Relationship was not
about wealth, power and good looking. It was about self-worth. So how long was
secret affair run? You know it really doesn’t matter anyway, one day, one week,
one month or one year? It was all the same. How do you see secret affair? Are
they like flashfloods that would eventually subside when the rain stop? I stopped while it is early before it reaches
the critical level. However I understand, mistake wasn’t mistake for once, it
is called accident. Mistake means one who repeat the wrong again and again. After
all don’t hope for other to forgive you, you may not be able to forgive
yourselves. You might have thought that was just accident, but I know cheating wasn’t
accident. That was just starting still than you already done to me. What more
if our relationship was old enough? It had already been hurt so much and also
hurt a lot of people. And even if I know you didn’t want to hurt me, you still
did blindly. It was really bullshit, so I stopped and we become two different
people. You might be too hurt and that was what I regret, because I know love
was there but trust wasn’t anymore. Now, I just want to forget all those
non-sense and move on but not with the past. Year from now, I will not look
back at that regret because I learned something. You may forever regret for
having risk the person you love and the relationship you value. My mistake was that I choose to love. If you
can only do when nobody can see, don’t do that because some people will hurt. Now
I can say, I don’t need anyone who didn’t need me. Actually you know, every
action has its own reaction, I won’t be there to punish you but you will be
punishing yourselves. That was the reality of samsara. Someday we will forget
the hurt, the reason we cried and who caused us pain. We will finally realize
that the secret of being happy and free of revenge but letting worthless to go.
If train doesn’t stop on your station, remember that is not your train. I am really
happy without you.
By my friend Sithar Wangdi